|
|
Wednesday, November 12, 2003
OK, people, here's how it is: the novel is not going well. I still haven't been able to get in sync with my characters. I'm struggling to build any kind of narrative world which I can just get into and write, like I have in years past. I've had three days so far in which I haven't written a word (that's 25% of the month), and I've constantly been behind schedule. My brain has been rebelling on me, and it's getting more insistent. Why are you doing NaNoWriMo at all? it asks. If you can't think of anything to write, then what's the point?
I was talking about this with a friend today, and in the middle of our conversation I just decided: fuck it. I am going to finish this goddamned contest. As soon as I said it, I realized that this is exactly the point of NaNoWriMo.
If I were an adept fiction writer, I wouldn't need the contest. I could write a novel any day of the year. But I'm not - I'm a terrible fiction writer. I can't think of a plot, I can't come up with characters, and I can't figure out what I'm writing about, which is why I need to keep going. I'm just now understanding this contest. No matter how badly you're stuck, you have to keep writing. In fact, the more stuck you are, the more you have to write.
It seems paradoxical. If you're stuck, how can you write more? You need to step away from the book for a while and re-evaluate, right? Wrong. There can be no re-evaluation. You re-evaluate by writing. There is a place out there where the words will flow freely, but you will never find it by standing still. Words are your footsteps. The only way to get anywhere is to write your way there.
Is this contest worth the effort? Who cares. There will be time to think about that in December. The challenge is here, now, and that's all that matters. If you finish, no matter how bad your novel, it's an accomplishment. If you quit, no matter how many words you write, you've failed. There's only one option.
So there it is. I'm doing this. I am not going to let my brain defeat me. How do you like the sound of that, brain? You're not so tough now, are you? I suppose you could try to stop me by triggering some kind of massive aneurism, but that'd be like taking your ball and going home, wouldn't it? I know you too well. You're not going to do that.
You're welcome to come along for the ride, brain, if you've got the guts, but I want to make two things clear: I'm driving this ship now, and I am going to finish this fucking novel, with or without you. Got it?
I was talking about this with a friend today, and in the middle of our conversation I just decided: fuck it. I am going to finish this goddamned contest. As soon as I said it, I realized that this is exactly the point of NaNoWriMo.
If I were an adept fiction writer, I wouldn't need the contest. I could write a novel any day of the year. But I'm not - I'm a terrible fiction writer. I can't think of a plot, I can't come up with characters, and I can't figure out what I'm writing about, which is why I need to keep going. I'm just now understanding this contest. No matter how badly you're stuck, you have to keep writing. In fact, the more stuck you are, the more you have to write.
It seems paradoxical. If you're stuck, how can you write more? You need to step away from the book for a while and re-evaluate, right? Wrong. There can be no re-evaluation. You re-evaluate by writing. There is a place out there where the words will flow freely, but you will never find it by standing still. Words are your footsteps. The only way to get anywhere is to write your way there.
Is this contest worth the effort? Who cares. There will be time to think about that in December. The challenge is here, now, and that's all that matters. If you finish, no matter how bad your novel, it's an accomplishment. If you quit, no matter how many words you write, you've failed. There's only one option.
So there it is. I'm doing this. I am not going to let my brain defeat me. How do you like the sound of that, brain? You're not so tough now, are you? I suppose you could try to stop me by triggering some kind of massive aneurism, but that'd be like taking your ball and going home, wouldn't it? I know you too well. You're not going to do that.
You're welcome to come along for the ride, brain, if you've got the guts, but I want to make two things clear: I'm driving this ship now, and I am going to finish this fucking novel, with or without you. Got it?
| NaNoWriMo Update | ||
| Total Word Count: | 22004 | |
| Daily Word Count: | 5266 | |
| % Complete: | 44.01% | |
| +/-: | +1604 words (.94 days) | |
Sunday, November 09, 2003
This weekend was a mixed bag on the novel-writing front. Volume-wise, I had a good weekend. I wrote almost 8000 words (including a 5200-word day on Saturday), which means that I'm pretty much caught up to where I should be. Quality-wise, however, I'm still suffering. I'm not at all happy with where the plot is going. Like last year, my narrative has bifurcated into two unrelated stories, and I bounce back and forth between them whenever I need a break. Effectively, I'm procrastinating writing one story by writing the other. I should patent that.
I've also taken to bribing myself. Since I met my goal of getting caught up by Sunday, I went out and bought the new The White Stripes album, "Elephant". Those kids know how to rock.
I've also taken to bribing myself. Since I met my goal of getting caught up by Sunday, I went out and bought the new The White Stripes album, "Elephant". Those kids know how to rock.
| NaNoWriMo Update | ||
| Total Word Count: | 15337 | |
| Daily Word Count: | 2328 | |
| % Complete: | 30.67% | |
| +/-: | +37 words (.02 days) | |